my pregnancy: the first 10 thoughts

week 36

This is my baby girl, Olivia.

She is so sweet and so fun to be with. 

I can say that because we have spent every day together during the last eight months. During that time, Olivia's little body has grown so much physically - which means mine has grown more :) And although my physical growth has been definitely substantial, my spiritual, mental, and emotional growth has been even greater.

Olivia has taught me that pregnancy isn't the terrible, awful, no good, very bad experience that I used to think it would be. Rather, carrying Olivia has taught me these 10 things about pregnancy (in order of what comes to mind first), with number one being this: 1) pregnancy can be so very good. 

2) Heavenly Father sincerely cares about my well-being as I help another one of His children have a body. He wants me to be happy and to enjoy the miracle of nurturing someone else with your whole heart and soul. 

3) That said, I've found that this promise is real and it works. 

4) Set goals. It's okay to have high hopes and desires for a healthy, happy pregnancy! I learned that it's okay to want to feel good about myself while pregnant. I decided to set some lofty goals for my pregnant self (like exercising every day), and goals we set for ourselves can be reached: please see number 5.

5) Praying about your hopes, dreams, and goals gives you these things that are vital to achieving a goal: desire to try, motivation to keep trying, and optimism when circumstances change. 

6) Exercising is amazing. Even though I now jog instead of run (although my "jogging" is the same as another woman's light walking), that time of moving, thinking, and breathing is relaxing and relieving. 

7) Stress is terrible. Any physical "ailment" I have had while being pregnant has been caused by stress. Example A: I had nasty migraines daily during my last finals week at BYU; I haven't been sick at any other time. Example B: last week I got an incredible cold sore as I let myself dwell on how much money a baby costs...I haven't had a cold sore for months. 

8) Yes, stress stinks. I have had to learn to let go of very many things - little worries and big ones - that I don't need to hold on to just to preserve Olivia and me - and Ryan (bless his heart!) from the awful thing called stress. 

9) Big changes that have come to my dear body are, actually, really good. I remember running one day when I suddenly felt how much my hips were jumping from side to side...whoa, I had never felt so large! But then I had to make myself think, "And yet, I am still moving! And bigger hips means bigger baby. Keep growing baby girl!" These were thoughts that I had to choose to think, but nonetheless, thinking them helped a lot. 

10) Although these eight months of pregnancy have been so happy overall, they have not been without moments of feeling very, very scared...my life is changing in ways I will never be able to perceive. But I have to remind myself of this: that is what I thought four months ago, when I didn't know how my life would be different when I was eight months pregnant, and guess what - now I am eight months pregnant and life is still good!

Yes, unknowns lay ahead and there is so much I can't see, but I have learned to trust: life will be good despite what is out of sight. Life can always be so very good.