'tis been a bit

oh where to begin with this smidgen...

First of all, I'm home of nearly three months now. Weird. 

But weird is good, for all the word really means is "strange and/or unusual."

It was strange to think of coming home, those last few days in Jerusalem. There was a surreal feeling in the Center and the city - our time was really ending? We had really been in Israel for four months, and now we were going home? Excited, a little nervous, but feeling fulfilled, too, we spent our last days following the Savior's last steps as closely as possible; we stayed together in the largest huddle of friends wandering our city; we cried a bit and said "goodbye."  

A few of my favorite last moments and messages:

"Do not go back to fishing" 

- Elder Jeffery R. Holland, the JC Upper Auditorium, 4.16.11

We were more than privileged to have Elder Holland stay with us at the Center during our last week as he was on assignment in the Middle East. The day after his arrival, our Sabbath, he kindly made room for us at the end of his busy day as he spoke to us personally in the Upper Auditorium as the lights of Jerusalem glowed behind him. Here is an excerpt from my journal entry that night. I hope the spirit and power of his very personal, very moving message to us can be felt through these few words...it was an hour I will never forget.

'What does being that disciple really mean, kids?' asked Elder Holland with a power that stilled the room. "It means you will walk through Gethsemane. It means you will cry His tears. It means you will suffer injustice, and you will summit at Calvary. Can anything less be expected from one that stands in the place of Jesus Christ on earth today?"

Elder Holland forcefully called on us to never go back to who we were, to what we were. "Don't you ever go back to fishing," he nearly demanded. Read John 21. After Christ died, not knowing quite what to do, the young, tender apostles simply returned to Galilee to resume their previous profession of fishing. The days in which they did so were unsuccessful. It wasn't until the Savior returned, calling them to him on the shores of Galilee (just like He did at the beginning of His ministry) that the apostles had any success at all. Then of love the Savior prepared them a breakfast meal, and there He asked Peter: "Do you love me?"

Christ gave Peter three opportunities to answer Him - three redemptive answers for Peter's recent three denials - and the Savior's admonition to Peter's "Yes, Lord, I love you," was "Then don't ever let me catch you fishing again...Feed my sheep" (John 21:16).

It was humbling to be in Elder Holland's presence for an extended period of time. He is an irony: a normal, humble grandpa, and yet - as we all know - one of the Lord's powerful anointed servants who today stands and speaks for Him. We ate a few meals with him when he was in the Center. Every student flocked to where he sat, eat of us hungering for any story, any counsel he had.  Here are a couple pictures from dinner on his last day:

And one of the big group just afterward, out on the patio with the city for a backdrop. Beauty.

Privileged kids, eh?  I think so. 

The Western Wall and the Dome were my picks for the last visits of the city on my last day. Of course, the places of the Savior's life - the Garden, the Tomb, the Upper Room - were prioritized for time above everything else, which is why we had full-day field trips both Monday and Tuesday to visit and be in those places. I wish I could describe what I felt as I moved from place to place and thought about Jesus Christ during those days. You do a lot of walking in Jerusalem...a lot...so I pulled out my little copy of "The Living Christ" as we stepped from place to place and memorized the document. That was a powerful experience for me. Now whenever I recite those beautiful words, I find myself in Old Jerusalem following my dear Savior.
Blessing.


Back to Wednesday, our last free day, spent at the Wall and the Dome. 
This is what we did:

 

Sara, me, Lindsay, Lauren

First we "Jewish" people watched. 

I'm not sure which one of my sweet JRu friends snapped this pic, but blessings be upon whoever did. I love this picture. This is exactly what we looked like that day; little huddles of JC kids all over the ground at the feet of the Wall. I still remember how I felt looking at the wall from looking at this little picture: 

truly grateful

amazed that I was there

 inspired to better worship

excited to enter a temple of God actually functioning on earth today

Then we "Mulism" people watched.

And we were watched by the Muslims.

I mean, a group of Americans that large, arrayed so...artistically...just hanging out at the Dome of the Rock. We were a sight. 
We were quiet - always respectful, of course. The Wall and the Dome taught me so much about culture and people and loving differences between us. These distinct icons of culture both confirmed, too, that even with differences there are "constants" - values of mankind that must be upheld: respect, communication, collaboration, belief. 


My time in Jerusalem ended, but my time with it has not. I think of it often. I've cried a little for it, I cannot tell a lie. Certain songs, a particular sunrise, a familiar JC face across campus - they all provoke that hot prick behind the eyes. Particular scriptures, old journal entries, finding old notes from dear friends tucked within the pages of my Bible - each still take me on the thousand-mile journey far from here to that place of hills and valleys, one not so dry as believed. It's good to think back. And it's been good to turn forward, so much sturdy truth and hope behind me. 


"Brethren, shall we not
 go on 
in  so great a cause? 
Go                
                                                   forward
and not 
backward   
Let your hearts rejoice, 
and be exceedingly glad
Let the earth break forth into singing. 
Let the dead speak forth 
anthems of eternal praise to 
the 
King Immanuel,
who hath ordained, before the world was,
that which would
 enable us
 to redeem them out of their prison; 
for the prisoners 
shall 
go 
free."

Doctrine & Covenants 128:22

That was the first thing that came as I thought what the last thing might be that I could say to you, dear Jerusalem. 

Don't go back to fishing.

Love one another.

He lives - the prisoners shall go free.

Thank you for the things you taught.