my dad's motto

For me, new school years are as bittersweet as grapefruit. They are refreshing, sweet, and sour all packed into one burst. I haven't always felt that way about them. It wasn't until I moved to Santa Clara in 2005 that starting school again became less than purely exciting. I was 14 when I moved. Those first months were hard. Even though I seemed totally fine on the outside, for a while I cried day-to-day as I walked home alone. I cried those silent tears that fall down your cheeks like quiet rain against a window. Lonely and unknown, I was a new girl. I was an underdog.

Growing up, my dad used to tell us, "Be kind to the underdogs!" every time he dropped us off for school. That was his motto, and the best part about his preaching it to us was that he lived it. I grew up watching my dad acknowledge those people on the sidelines that seemed to be alone. However, it wasn't until I found myself feeling that way - totally alone in a new place, almost sinking beneath the weight of all the changes around me - that I learned what my dad meant when he said, "be kind."

All those years he meant, "Smile at someone who looks sad. Really smile. Ask how they're doing and really listen. Don't just say 'hi,' talk to them. Learn who they are."

Never did I grasp the importance of lifting the heavy heart of another until my own became terribly weighed down. Never did I learn how an underdog felt until I, myself, became one. And never, until then, did I learn that helping another feel divine is the way that you yourself feel truly happy.

Those underdog feelings come back to me with every new school year, as I think about someone out there that feels as scared and alone as I once did. I felt them this year and I didn't even start school. Just watching Ryan run off to his first day of the semester was enough to make me ache for that new, freshman girl on campus that is quiet, far away from home, and so unsure about almost everything. I cried a few tears for her, and then I prayed that someone would give her a smile - a real one.

Really smile, really listen, learn who someone really is.

Thank you, sweet Dad, for giving me a motto that I will teach my own little girl: be kind to the underdogs.